Tall Girls Don't Get Boyfriends

Mama Lai and I have an ongoing dispute about wearing heels.  Mama Lai and I are the same height and sometimes she takes it rather personally when I choose to go out in public with her wearing heels:

"You already lucky to be so tall!  But now you are too tall.  Men don't like tall girls."

I try to counter with an argument laced with some feminism in the form of "I do it for me because I like it and I think it looks good".  Mama Lai dismisses it as misdirected vanity:

"You do not walk around with a mirror to see yourself.  When men see you in heels they don't think you look good, they will just think you look tall."

Square Face

I mentioned to Mama Lai that my roommate commented that one of my guy friends, who she’s met on occasion, was handsome.  Mama Lai shook her head and said:

“I don’t get you young people’s taste.  His head is square.  How can he be handsome?”

A Different Kind of Beautiful

Mama Lai loves watching television and commented that the new slough of television actresses are very, very pretty, noting that I'm dealing with a lot of beautiful competition in the dating pool where I live (in Los Angeles).  And Mama Lai, in a rare moment of sympathy for me, said:

"Don't worry.  You set yourself a standard where you challenge yourself to be good, to be better.  And when you achieve it, that's really what is truly beautiful."

English Only

Papa Lai likes to complain that his brood doesn't speak Chinese well enough (and in the Little Prince's case, hardly at all).  Being the brassy, disobedient Chinese American daughter that I am, I counter his criticism with my own: he never spoke Chinese to us growing up so it's really his fault.

Even now, as I actively seek to improve my language skills, I speak Chinese to Papa Lai and he replies to me in English.  Papa Lai's defense:

"I'm old ok?  Old habits are hard to break and you can't teach an old man new tricks."

The 2011 Prediction

At the end of 2010 Mama Lai confided in me that she had this very strong feeling that 2011 is the year I will have a boyfriend.  She couldn't explain it, but she just knows it's my year.  Mama Lai gave me a hug, pinched my fat and said:

"Keep moving forward with more weight loss!  Let's make him a good one!"

Family Vacation

Now that all three of Mama Lai's ducklings are adults, it's been harder for us to get together to have a proper family vacation.  Mama Lai was brainstorming with me and Duckie on exotic locations like China or Taiwan or Thailand when Papa Lai piped up:

"How about Kansas?"

The room went silent.  Why Kansas?

And Papa Lai sheepishly said:

"I heard that Martina has a ranch there."

Well burst out in laughter causing Papa Lai to retire for the night.  We have not yet made at trip to Kansas yet.  But Mama Lai did take Papa Lai to see Martina McBride at a concert last year.

The Heels Situation

I once rang Mama Lai when I was on my way to meet a date.  Mama Lai always likes to make sure I'm prepared and runs me through a checklist of things to make sure I'm "date ready".  The checklist always ends with making sure I'm not wearing heels, which I'm prone to do as the vast majority of my footwear elevates my height by a few inches:

 "All I'm saying is, you're already tall enough.  And there is no reason for you to give yourself another disadvantage when it comes to men."

(And this debate will continue to rage on... )